Dangerous Idea 2- The Problem Isn't That You're Not Perfect It's That You Feel You Have To Be

Also known as a love letter of sorts to Barbara Ehrenreich.She has a new book out which in and of it self makes me really really happy.

My last post has more than a few links which made me think really hard aout why I was restarting ro even undertaking a series on Dangerous Ideas.

One is that I am unafraid to admit I am a know it all of amazing cosmic proportions and given the chance to think out loud on something I feel passionate about with an audience is always a plus. The other is that I am greatly disturbed but hey if you read this blog you know that hasn't changed in three/four years.

But part of my rambling online is a bout having a vision or a goal for what I wanted the world to be. I am not special in that, any activist/artist/writer who doesn't have this handy streak of megalomania is a liar , a fraud, or a charaltan usually all three. You don't have to like it , you can fight it with every fiber of your being but they have it.

And I never wrote it down, I seriously never have I think in all the time I have been blogging wrote down the tenets of my values and the two pieces I linked lastpost made me go

Well That DEFINITELY ISN'T IT !

But what pray tell is it , why haven't I written it down, why don't you have a plan BIG MOUTH?!?

and the only excuse I could come up with is that it wasn't perfect and bullet pointed so I had o wait.

but if i waited for perfect I'd never write anything, and sure enough in the comment's of Trouble's dreamwidth journal spot willow made a really good point of what BIG SWEEPING CHANGES means to others and my mind went of and around on goals.

What does it mean to be perfect and whose perfect is the perfect and and and how is this discussion treated?

A friend linked this article in NewGeography and I believed that more than informed my thinking. Including the comments .

The White City.

There is a shitload of things to unpack but the idea of the " unintended consequences of the pursuit of perfection"

We define perfection according to our values, our values define our allegiance. And in bad a= b , b=c, therefore b=c.

Our view of perfection defines our allegiances, and our allegiances define our perfection.

The thing that perfection does is not only define our end goal but also our start point. The way one defines perfect or best will tell you how one protects and operates through life. When we say that " nobody's perfect" we tell each other what we believe we WOULD be aiming for if we were trying to be perfect.

But not everyone is trying to be perfect and we often put perfect into a category of

" Shit we will never attain no way no how"

AkA : If i define it as part of the "perfect" it's another way of saying pleasantly don't get your hopes up"

it also describes the process of mental triage . If we are forced to we do what we can control for what is

MOST IMPORTANT. It is our definition of the BIG PICTURE.

and it more insidiously tells us what to ignore.

Looking through my links Reconcile had the most succinct and dagger sharp way of putting it but it took my breath away:

"

Progressive blogs attract readers who feel safe at that blog. Trolls and hate-mailers aside, you have the commenters you have because you regularly challenge privilege they wish to see challenged, and you do not challenge privilege they do not wish to see challenged. Their bigotry is a reflection of your own.

"

It applies not just to blogs but replace that with cities , movements, spaces,media.

For things we want we set up systems of dealing with and handling their pursuit. I will never be PERFECTLY clean but I wash everyday. The fact that I am not perfectly sterile doesn't stop the need for SUSTAINING the basic conditions of life.

So why is it excusable to not try and attain comfortable lives for ALL citizens, why isn't diversity part of why we think of admirable cities, why aren't we going well won't be perfect but we can be better every day?

and BA if you could tell us why you like Barbara Ehrenreich before we all die of boredom.

So this article on women's happiness made me really happy. One because unlike a corresponding time article she notes realy quickly that the women are white. Something Time failed miserably at.

But it also pointed out that the idea of perfect/best/strongest is

USED TO SELL US SOMETHING.

Perfection is a fail safe for telling us what we need to do and also for realeasing whoever is telling us this from any responsibility.

Perfection ( and it's pursuit) should result in taking stock of where we are and moving forward. Instead it often results in measuring yourself against some arbitrary ( usually defined by privilege or proximity to the golden desires of the seller ) metric and receiving benefits ( or not) accordingly.

If you receive ( or are preloaded) with those benefits , you have successfully completed it and whether you recieved it through actually adhering to those steps ehh well.

Those benefits justify your superiority and also eliminate

any need for you

TO WORK!

Cities don't have to check to see if something is viable , or if it matches it's own constituents. It has a rubrick of perfect.

People don't have to examine themselves, they just have to be happy , or " fulfilled"

Doing what you " love" is the goal ( yet why does no one talk about church ladies, or underpaid teachers why are they always business ventures )

Doing what produces happiness in Holland is alright, because if they are happy it's alright.

It's perfect.

In humans it has a two fold effect

It's protestant predestination all over again. Where in if you are happy and fulfilled ( even if that means you simply drew the culture appropriate lot in birth) you deserve it.

You are validated in having no other goal than ensuring your permanent gratification

or the feeling of it.

And if you haven't you literally CAN'T critique it, because you're dislike of it and your failure to attain it is your OWN FAULT. We don't worry about you.

Perfection assures it's state

and destroying anything but the most vigilant adherents to it's implausibility.

It prevents us from being in the now , from being connected because we can't stand still in it

If we measure ourselves against " perfection" we often shut down our ability to survey because anything that isn't oriented that way is vile.

It's PATENTLY unsustainable

and it justifies treating anything that might damage even it's pursuit as cancerous.

Including other people, ideals or hey REALITY.

Marketing one's self for or as a path towards perfection is designed to leave people in the dust. It creates a solitary identity that both for these cities and HRC campaign and feminism and black politics .

Because if we can not make it we will try to cut as much as we can to seem as if we're
thisclose.

And who better to cut than people we treat as not there.

And if we ARE the people who aren't there it's gotta be our fault.

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This is just an awesome piece and I think necessary reading for every " professional" identity. Would you do it if the only reward was teh advancement of the good?