I came to a really really fun realization about something that has been irking me aout certain discussions
" Why are you focusing on hurt"
Because no one else does.
Why on earth do I have to justify in my space actually you know writing and talking about my own hurt?
Even when we chastised for how they are used improperly no one asks if white women have the right to their feelings, they may have a right to where they express them or HOW?
people don't have a problem with where I express my feelings
WHAT I am expressing
or even
HOW
but the fact that I express them at all
as if they have a consequence.
What would happen if millions of little girls thought their feelings had weight that they had to be responsible for but mattered and they had a right to defend them in any way that didn't cause harm indiscriminately?
Answer that and then ask me why I think it's okay for me to "focus" on hurt
6 comments:
This post reminded me a lot of Audre Lorde's words:
"...love often is pain. But I think what is really necessary is to see and still live unblinded. And it is necessary to determine how much of this pain I can use. That is the essential question that we must all ask ourselves. There is some point where pain becomes an end in itself, and then we must let it go. On the one hand, we must not be afraid of pain, but on the other we must not subject ourselves to pain as an end in itself... I find I must remember that the pain is not its own reason for being. It is a part of living. And the only kind of pain that is intolerable is pain that is wasteful, pain from which we do not learn. And I think that we must learn to distinguish between the two."
#lordefail
Hey there!
I have to give it to you... you are always bringing it!
I wrote a post last year, "Disbanding The Cult of Pain" because I felt that black women focus too much on woundedness. Now that I read your post, you have given me something more to consider.
The salvific impact of validating our deepest feelings...
Rock on, sista...
Real.
Raw.
Remarkable.
{raised black fist}
Peace, blessings and godliness,
Lisa
thanks bwwbtt
Hi Blackamazon,
I haven't commented here before but have been a big fan for quite a while now, a bit of lurker and yeah not always good with the comments, but just really impressed and inspired by your words from afar. (Australia actually!) I really love this post, and I think it is important and answers and explains some things really well. I was thinking of posting a link to it on an activist e-list here where some pretty strange, unexpected and not always pleasant discussion has sprung up in response to someone writing about some oppression they've experienced in our network. I guess just checking in that you would be cool with your words turning up on a random Australian e-list is all...
Thanks again so much for your words and insight, and complete respect for the work you do.
Libby
feeel free libby
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