Truth Telling

So I was gone for a week and and missed some things I'm glad I did, read a book that made me annoyed with a whole lot of people

I missed something I really hoped I wouldn't and if they will be so kind as to excuse my tardiness I would like to participate

National Day of Truth Telling by the wonderful women of Ubuntu

So here are a few of my unassailable truths.

People are selfish ,self absorbed jerks.

It allows me to go through my life with joy and optimism.

Why ?

Because I believe very little in the world is ABOUT me.

When people do things it became very clear to me early on that it was about them . How it feels to feel good about them , about how they think of themselves.

And the truth is ..

I feel little to nothing for the sisterhood anymore.

It doesn't exist.

And I thank god for it everyday.

Don Imus and VT showed that to me loud and clear.

Suddenly race was on everyone's lips.

No one asked the sistas.

And I mean the poor ones the ones who were degraded. Not the ones who looked good and had pedigrees.

No one asked the loudmouths, the protesters,the women who had stopped buying hip hop albums long ago and had been flipping their shit since time immemorial.

No one asked the ones whose main concern was not that they had been called nappy , but that they had been disrespected.

It became a referendum on hiphop where the shining talented acceptable got to wring their hands, and if we weren't pictured we obviously had accepted it no?

Where hip hop became some devil music even though emo songs talk heavily about emotional manipulation and "deep" white male artist songwriters are let go for their pretty lyrics

which are always a women who did them wrong.

BEcause their needs to be a referendum because the underlying message is that we need to check these men

VT was the quickness with which an American is cast out the fold. How fast can we spin s tories and tell tales to make him not one of ours.

Because the truth is POC/WOC unless we are " good ones" we are never one of theirs.

When my body and my trauma when my emotions when my sisters are only relevant on the days you remember when we are women

When the pressure when the fury that comes with our skin and eyes is only thought about when it hurts you?

How long do you hope we believe that it involves us at all?

As a blogger of color , I am often stunned by how often things are forgotten when we come up?

How often my monetary poverty is more important than my stellar education. How much more comfortable people are calling BFP a single mother no matter how many times she mentions her husband.

How many times unity is called for when they fun out of topics and forget how often I was called stupid to my face.

Truth Is

The book I've finished Unhooked brought this into stark relief. (courtesy of the fabulous folk at black folk)

I officially do not care at all about White womens battle of sex and femininity. Not a whit Not a jot not at all.

Let the sisterhood duke it out over and over again being as disrespectful and rude to each other as possible.

Let one side battle about how best to en joy the hundreds of years of privilege over black bodies, and brown ones while co opting our clothes,fashions, and literally physical attributes

and continue to ask us to to find benevolence in that while swearing up and down we do it not to have more power than you but just for ourselves.

Go ahead

While the other sides throws around words like slut and whore, and no woman would. Not for once thinking of those who can and do or who may have no choice. Go ahead make the cock sucking lips cracks and dancing like trash giggles and guffaws and backpedal madly , about these things and remember us only when you can't think of anything else you're relatively easy exisistance offers you

Please go right ahead

Please argue somemore about the protection garunteed to you while making bad choices or silly ones or self indulgent stupid ones

While never ever EVER considering what goes in to you being able to choose at all.

Truth Is

Their is no sisterhood. I can only depend on those who actually stand with me.

because the sisterhood can continue arguing about how we reach orgasm and how we dress and eat and stand and sit

And the women of Juarez will still disappear

The sisterhood can talk about abortion till it's blue in it's face parsing and plotting arguing and card checking

And women in Columbia, and Sunrise Heights will never ever get to make that decision again because their right to have children will never register as important enough to have an out for your mistakes.

Truth Is

The distrust we feel has gotten to the point that it only grows when you do show up.

Because there is something in it for you

Truth Is

Class woman has never existed. Just women with you and women not.

And some people may be interested in fixing this but first you must tell the truth.

Because the truth is

for many it's already to late
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Random musings

I DO NOT NOT LOOK LIKE JILL SCOTT! ( great wom an GORGEOUS woman no real resemblance)

I look eve n less like angie stone

Everyone is talking about race now, Race is the new enlightened topic that shows your deep and thinking.

We don't want me to riff on that.

Why is that my accomplishments are either diminished or embellished by my color but never my class.

People aren't allowed to talk about social capitol till they know what it means.

Apolo Ohno is the sexicutest human alive.

my nails grow naturally like acrylics..... except I want ovals

MY WIFEY COMES TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I also need to find a monologue for a competition Im in on friday anyon e interested in attending

LEave a comment!
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New blogging IDea

Hello friends,

i have a new request?idea.

Due to some interesting developments in la blogosphere

I had an idea....


Let's send me to the Allied Media Conference.

SO if you have an idea that will help me monetize this blog ( until i hit can attend AMc pay dirt)
please post away!

LEt's see how peopel behave while I am in the room!
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Because there IS a voice under all of that

Manal Omar writes a FASCINATING piece about what happens when muslim women become a topic of conversation without being involved in it.

Because someone else always knows what's best for you.

At no point had the journalist contacted me. She seemed to have decided to take a similar approach to the man in the swimming pool - talking about me, not to me. As did David Lloyd's, which had backed up his story without consulting me. At no point did they bother to inform me, a paying member, that such an article was being written. I contacted the Oxford Mail, offering them my side of the story. I never heard back.

Does she sound oppressed to you?

Special thanks to sex and race on live journal
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I

Have the flu and it annoys me!
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Are we SERIOUS ?!?!?

So right now I'm sick and my head hurts so I can t be eloquent I can't be verbose.

AGAIN A MOTHERFUCKING GAIN!!!!!!!!!!

THIS SHIT IS NOT ACCEPTABLE!

It's not.

It's not acceptable when people twiddled their fucking thumbs teh first time. It's not acceptable that internet shaming and death threats only seem to matter if your white.

I'm right now on the seriousness having been threatened, fighting with kids, and now in a real bad way.

If you read this blog, if you read DD's blog , if I see you comment and I don't see some shit on this somewhere even if you gotta post a comment on a "big" blog so they get off their narcissistic asses.

We gots problems.

Everybody's fingers work , so can I get a link a line

SOMETHING

FOR FUCKING HELLS SAKE!

And tell me.

People seem to want to sit on their fucking thumbs this time fine I Will keep a motherfucking tally , for all the sistren who showed some support.

And fine if that makes me the feminist police go head , if you got to talk shit about me to get off your ass , I'll take an attention bringing whine over that deadly silence any day.

Cause it's sisterhood

Cause every woman's voice is important

How about their lives?

Signed

a sick and tired, and actually sick and tired BA.
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and life goes ehhh so

I Do a meme

Sylvia's fault. BFP, Ren EV, Donna do the damn thing

A- Available or Single? SOOOOOOOOOOO Single
B- Best Friend. Wow that's not a category in my life right now
C- Cake or Pie. Right now honey soaked pakistani mini cake things
D- Drink of Choice. Ice Water, passionfuit juice
E- Essential Item. Books and ipod
F- Favorite Color. Blue and red
G- Gummi Bears or Worms. Screw that blue and purple pixie sticks
H- Hometown. I'm form New York New York
I- Indulgence. I over indulge . I'm going to be focusing on makeu now though
J- January or February. January.Gave me the mommy
K- Kids. Tired of teaching em!
L- Life is incomplete without… love.logic,friends faith honest and someone you love to kiss, who loves to kiss you
M- Marriage Date. Someday
N- Number of Siblings? I am the Alpha
O- Oranges or Apples? Oranges all citrus
P- Phobias/Fears. Heights, also abnormal sensitivity to loud and shrill noises. Wanna see funny have an ambulance drive by BlackAmazon on floor writhing in pain
Q- Favorite Quote. What comes a do- Guyanese saying or my mommmy saying
R- Reasons to smile. Sun,beefcake friends life, Streetcar named desire
S- Season. Summer
T- Tag Three. Donna BFP Ren EV
U- Unknown Fact About Me. Well, if I told you, it wouldn’t be unknown would it?
V – Vegetarian or Oppressor of Animals. Oppressor of animals. next to the potatoe cooked just enough not kill me served to me by my man servant - lats oh bubble butt
W- Worst Habit. My secret
X – X-rays or Ultrasounds. Niether
Y- Your Favorite Foods. I have a curry timer must have come form of tumeric inme at least once a week of if not twice the next. Puddings custard
Z- Zodiac. I am teh psoter child for leo
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The true definition of real dirtynasty complicated american sex

Streetcar Named Desire
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What do we say when the number one priority of the people reporting this is to make the hsooter some demon without context.


Do we really learn anything

Do we want to.

I mean do we want o understand the serires of screwups failings misogynies racisms and isolation and community that could cause this

or do we just want to assrue our selves one of ours doesn't do this?
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I just I just I'm trying to work it out

It has already begun

Because I remember when I used to read salon and think wow they are helping me learn and grow .

That was six years ago .

This is the stuff I can't abide anymore.

I saw it coming but I couldn't believe it would happen like this.

It's the kind of half assed were smarter than the already racist hicks stuff.

It's not journalism, it's barely reporting.

Where is the talk about why people feel the need to isolate themselves and go home., or why folks.

Why will no one say what we all see, that the " reporting ' on this has been maddeningly racist. An American for over FIFTEEN years has suddenly become every barely coded disgusting " euphemism" . That it's not the right wing blogs but the CNN , the NYT,

The salon that would publish half an article with a beautiful face of grief.

Suddenly these people aren't students, teachers professors lovers first? But " Asians" as if it's not a whole FUCKING CONTINENT.

Or that most of em born and bred in America?

Why not talk about why they can't even truly participate in the need to heal their souls form senseless violence.

be cause it ain't just the right wing bloggers, or the racists

It's the people who would so quickly disown each other for a very very small piece of moral or intellectual highground

But we can't pat our selves on the backs as liberals if we truly sat with ourselves and asked how it could happen


Around 16 I read about how anthropologists went around and diagnosed socio/cultural psychological

odd epidemics and " curious" maladies

It made me wonder why none of these was done on the US.

As a child foreigners so many things about Americans were ( and frankly still are ) perplexing .

We can never figure out how a young man comes to kill 33( oh dear sweet Jesus there may be more) in our land

after 15 years as our

How does he come to be so isolated he can take lives with no remorse

When we cast him out do we really learn or just prove his point.

And what does any of this do to help us never forget or never again.

And why do we never ask why always us why again.

or do we just cut off those parts again and again

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Kevin of Slant truth is looking for his brother. Until he is located I will be posting al ink to KEvin's post with every post I write

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Domestic Dispute

This is where the misogyny or our culture gets people hurt.

Students were prevented from being warned and properly protected because the first shootings were dismissed a s a domestic dispute.

This is the worst shooting in the HISTORY of the us and it was let go because we as a society " understand" violence against women.

We tacitly think that a killing between lovers is acceptable.

As in killing her doesn't make you violent to others, because haven't we all wanted to kill a woman at some point?

we understand.

Until we don't.
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* open mouthed shock*

My sweet sweet jesus . my sweet sweet sweet lord.

Oh please please dear father,sacred mother, god within me , ancestors above me , earth below my feet.

Let these people go to you whomever they are to whichever one of you they need safely.

Give them our love for it is with them,

give their families our sorrows for those are all we can give

may our history open to us so we know how we failed them.

May our hearts open so we can grow beyond this

Whatever we need oh heaven may we find it

before it is too late again
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New Dillemma

Checking Credit Card statement.

A dinner I had recently , I put on my card.


Our waiter was busy or off so we gave the check to a manager , and drunk as as skunks we toddled off into the night.


THEY DIDN'T ADD THE TIP.

Now as I said im in the bag so I barely know his name. Can't find my receipt how can i get this man his money , without jsut going


Uh i was here drunk singing happy birthday and i know i tipped this man cause i tip people and can you charge me more money please and thanks!
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NOWW

Next person who even intimates that NOW speaks for me and cares about me after their behavior with this Imus bullshit

GETS CUT

Anybody who tells me what we need more of is representation in NOW

GETS CUT


They came late to the party and want to say they did shit.


So now the NOW wants accolades for being one of the LAST major organizations to defend a group of women.....
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And I'm gonna need you to shut the fuck up.

Questions:

Sean Bell caught his bullets in front of a strip club that was regularly shoddily patrolled by police? Has there been any sexworker , and or those concerned mention of that?

Tell me why I Need to respect police when the tell a 60 year old woman speaking on boycotting the Post

" Not to get yourself in trouble"

At this point people I'm just gonna ask a whole mess of you

To shut the fuck up.

In no particular order

Don Imus- I am 22 years on this earth my daddy has never called me in this house a ho. And the few peopel who did do it to me ended up a ) running from me or b) fighting with me so you can shut the fuck up

Anyone who keeps griping about free speech.

Dear dumb entitled assholes,

I know your dream is that you can run off at the mouth and talk about how you have Ted Nugent style risen to a level above the unwashed masses and smarter than the suits.

Except the unwashed masses give the suits the audience that lets them pay bills so you can be indulged. So no it doesn't matter that other folks do it. If enough of these people decide they won't be a part of the mass to justify paying the bills .

ITS GONE

Free speech still available , you could stand at any street corner or website and talk your shit if it's that important.

Oh that's right you're hoping for a damn deal and this lets you know you might not be able to justt splooge in your hand as content and call it opinion.

You... shut the fuck up

Dear White Male Columnists,

BOOHOOOOO. Had they been nicer Imus may have been the vangaurd of the discussion .

BULLSHIT

Boohooo , Al and jesse are opportunists

No shit?

Booohoooo this means no real discussion can go on because instead of forgiveness they took vengence?

HORSESHIT

Listen and listen good you want a converstaion, an open conversation ? You got to give up the idea that the only one who has to have stakes involved is everyone whose not you. No you know the stakes still wanna converse or are you just

Chickenshit

You might actually have consequences and need to take consideration of what spews form your mouth


Sit down and if you ain't got nothing useful to say

Have a coke and a smile.


Anyone who has tried to lionize by saying he opened up dialogue.....


Sorry that sound you heard was a large black woman convulsing in laughter. Black folk been in fighting on that one since the 18th cetury. Shit Malcolm X and the NOI were bucking Negro in the 50's. You know nothing and you desire to find some way for white folk to look good in this one.

Shut the fuck up.


Any body who wants to toute innocence guilt or ask for an apology from me on the Duke case,

Please take Legal Studies 101 and then Terminology 102 , when you are thusly finished .

KISS MY BLACK ASS.


Liberal bloggers bitching about Kos and how he handled blogrolls and the Kathy Sierra situation,

When Liza was told to mind her betters. You were silent.

When DD, Sokari,BFP got this where were you, oh right some of you were sending it.

When we were posting and posting for what seemed like every other MOTHERFUCKING DAY
on please don't kill maim torture ignore Oaxaca/Nigeria/ Afghanistan/ West Bedford/ and nothing FUCKING Came from you people I expected nothing

But I got post 3343865 on John Edwards

I sucked it up and I rode wit yall

Cause it was the right thing to do.

Now you have no sympathy from me. You made a king unaccountable and so he reigns.

Good luck to ya!

Dear "Feminist" Bloggers,

As of now we are in a dangerous place you and I.

I don't read you but I've noticed when I am linked to you from sistren blogs my ideas and thoughts come up like the boogieman.

I am protected by CCLicense please keep fucking with me.

More importantly so is BFP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!,

Vultures, you're fucking vultures.

Emotional,spirtual content vultures. How many of you hopped double quick to save Amanda and Kathy while NOTHING came through for DD and sokari and BFP while blatantly stealing their content?

How many of you use your once in a blue moon cause it can be about me posts to point out your diversity to the proper advertisers, media outlets and large scale organizations and never once ONCE post on the places you blatantly steal from

While making sure you spend large amounts of time telling us we're hurting your feelings or trampling over ours

Yeah needing you to shut the fuck up.

Oh and this can be translated into French in case you want a more upscale talk


But unless you have something to say or do that doesn't involve covering your ass or saving your skin

Yeah I'm gonna need you to shut the fuck up
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HIp Hop didn't do that shit

I'm not a good person to talk to right now.

My mother took the machete out the house when I was young fearing my dad was a lil to quick to get at people in the neighborhood.


I haven't written on Imus cause Sylvia really is that fucking good , and I stopped writing abut Duke .

Then I woke up and saw The Post.

And read the comments about Imus and rappers.

And TONY BLAIR RAN HIS FOOL ASS MOUTH

Immediately had to type in Jesus into the iTunes cause Al Green had to convince me not to scream or cry.


The Duke case is a disaster , but It really does amuse me how people's complete ignorance of law procedure, and careful ( and by careful I mean sensationalists, sexist,racist, hegemony preserving clap trap) selective press coverage, pseudo feminist support, can result in the complete destruction of a woman's life.

She was converted into a hip hop type to make it easy to slander and blame and tidly culturally analyze. The video ho, that girl the counterpart to the over sexed rapper , part of the hip hop conspiracy to skip merrily down the way to ruin?

Because while everyone is taking time to assure that we know the boys are thought to be innocent and they get their apologies, everyone seems to forget that the victim didn't want to press charges and has been running hither and yon in fear from pamphlets and death threats.

There are no charges, so lets name her! Even though she was wrongfully named when there WERE , so please absolve of any culpability we have in further fucking up her life , so we must be thorough.

Thorough when you made sure we knew she was stripper, before we knew they were gay bashers?

Thorough when their Duke reputation as sports gods came up time and time again but little was made of her navy service.

Oh and I promise they will comeo out with every wrong deed she did in life cause we need to KNOW!!!!!!!!!

So while Broadsheet and others make very careful to sound measured and " correct" about the boys, no minstrations are made her way. or reproachfulness about the coverage are brought up now , because the shitty way this was handled and helped this mess continue is less important that making sure people know you were measured in your response.

OR how many people felt the same about the CP case ?

RIGHT O, because a proper investigation which respected both VICTIM and accused would have caught discrepancies earlier. It couldn't be that someone was grandstanding or that the entire thing was macrcossomed into the RACE CASE

or that popular coverage went might quick to " HOW DOES THIS AFFECT THE WHITE GIRLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" ( hey rolling stone thanks for that , also appreciate the relevant music ,scene coverage and quality music........ oh right wait)

and of course but but how can we blame it on hip hop today?


Which of course Imus and Tony Blair and everyone wants to run to.

Guess what the number one consumers of hip hop are... white kids. Street stuff teh stuff teh scary black kids love RARELY gets the air play the guns and banging bullshit these morons liek to point out as the downfall of society.

But my question is when did you become a society of idiots? When did the fact taht hip hop which doesn't no matter what anybody says have the ENFORCED corporate ubiquity that say beauty,fastfood,movies, porn, religion have but anybody says something about that

Whinging and whinging on the personal responsibility................................

So is it only when it concerns black people is it completely irresistable

There has NEVER ever been a REASON needed to disrespect Black women, or to take a half assed approach towards black crime , or to disregard black people.

What there hasn't been until recently ( * takes a minute to do a go my people dance*) are alrge amounts of fiscally socially power POC's allied to start hitting pockets. While there is much less of a carte blanche belief in white supremacy ( shit ain't sweet by no means) , so you r intent or your belief doesn't mean shit...

What i find especially amusing is white people missing the basic concept of you CAN say whatever you want . You can go ahead have a blast do your thing. Short of fire or incitement to violence with the goal to cause it, shout it from the mountaintops.

Except if I hear it and I decide to who ride. you have to deal with it.

Privilege results in lazy ass motherfuckers who have no desire to deal with the responsibility of their "rights". It is expected you'll be unchallenged un shaped and allowed to do whatever.

Hip Hop didn't do that.

Hip hop didn't up and decide that these portrayals would hit the mainstream with resonance. Hip hop did not get elected by the International Association of the Black/African Diaspora as blackness to be the convenient scape goat when white folk figure out we ain't taking this shit no mo.

Hiphop doesn't make Our female allies slow out the fucking gate to stand up, or that gay bashing white boys are pitted against grandstanding DA's and leave a lone black woman the face of all evil?

Or a dried out tired media using any opportunity to scare up flagging sales?

Or one white man using rash misogynistic racist language to speak in barely coded terms to his audience and getting caught cause he went after a high profile Cinderella team.

or a weak PM trying to justify doing everything but run his country, and protect his people. Where were the commentary on the rash of racial attacks Tony?

Hip Hop didn't do that shit it just gave it a beat and a hook


Edited to add read UBUNTU
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Okay Need this from ya.

See this young lady made an awesome documentary about the psychic damage undergoing young women of color ( specifically black)

and she might win 10,000

please vote for her

http://www.cosmogirl.com/entertainment/film-contest

Kiri Davis

Because what young women need is another no peer pressure or weight focused " go girl" message being contrasted with teh shit they try and sell em.

I'm not even playing right now.

VOTE
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Ugly Americans, PUA and baby backed Bullshit

So in my sprinkling of fairy dust I mentioned that I wanted to unpack The PUA slash Ugly American discussions using philosphy.

The Philosphy of Bullshit.

Frankfurt's On Bullshit contends that the problem with bullshit isn't that its falacious but that in the end of it all , it has nothing to do with truth at all. Bullshit is what happens when the speaker believes that the most important point of the conversation is demonstrating something about themselves Without clear intent.

I'm homing to take that one step further by arguing that one of the staples of internet " wit" is one of the worst forms of bullshit and that this internet phenomena is a big part of PUA repertoire and that's why it's so much icky ness.

Snark is bullshit.

The reason I"m melding the two concepts of Ugly American and PUA in this case that in the posts addressing the two it becomes evident really early that they depend very much on false binaries , and frankly shitty shitty mindsets to excuse misogyny/colonialism/orientalism/ general class bias .

In the case of the travel post that Kactus rightfully skews and Donna opens to discussion later is that in the entire Dewy eyed conversation of what they need to do to get a better understanding of cultures , almost no one mentions " your own legwork".

Or that to approach any culture as something that can be understood through singular encounters ( and I'm going leave the ooh exotic non conventional other cooks for me meme ALONE)

is one of the most rude ideas I've ever fucking heard.

Of course it is constructed in that amazingly bullshit way that the only other option besides this fairy eyed how can we do better is isolationist throughfare mongering, demonstrating closemindedness, because people who wander and often intrude are much more open than those who don't.

It could never be a case where you might want to respect the places the country has shown are comfortable FOR THEM for you to be versus running roughshod so you can find a new space.

Also notice how it's never treated that the hospitality of the " natives" is always presented as such , not as the hospitality of one human to another.

The underlying problem is that Americans need to " learn" how to treat humans like humans because they don't practice it within America. This feeling of an all American standard is starry eyed bullshit that ignores inequities of travel and life within America.

Kactus breaks it down LOVELY when she points out how people do the shit in America without it seems a second thought.

Amanda's lil bullshit rejoinder is as Kactus points out classist offensive crap , but it's a prime example of how snark is used to " regulate" the convo and set the tone of how it shall be talked of. While the commentator uses his qualms to explore why this phenomenon everyone is mourning is so prevalent, Amanda chooses to use it to smack someone down because their spoiling their fun and as an intro to but but when I was poor i did....

OH for love of god can it please.

Because a person with a computer, which is now basically a necessity , is of course ripe for ridicule

BULLSHIT!

A valid point , that if you talk about international travel without the proper sense of OH SHIT I'm really really lucky, might prohibit you from discussing how not to be a dipshit is misrepresented as a whiny class gripe.

GREAT that'll help. Especially because as someone whose ENTIRE family scatters across the globe, there is no opportunity for leisure travel . I go someplace I'm visiting kin and because my early international travels have that flavor all of my subsequent ones ( I hope please jesus) have the same.

OR as Kai says:

Obviously the best way to travel to another country is to be invited as a guest of someone who lives there

I'm gonna go once further and say you should ALWAYS behave as if you're a guest. ANYWHERE THATS NOT YOUR OWN DAMN HOUSE.

You're a guest. Your money doesn't entitle you to shit you are a GUEST of the country, ANYTHING YOU GET at all is a gift, beaten path or not. Of course that convo can't happen because it is more important to demonstrate the wit of smacking down someone not towing the We have a right to travel line and we're enlightened line.

There in lies the bullshit , there was no actual desire to discuss solutions to travel inequity or being a non ugly american , ugly americans were invented so everyone could marvel at their own enlightment and special experiences.

Same with the PUA community in TG and Amp's thread. Women are invented to justify the PUA community , which is hilarious because

IN THE COMMMUNITY THE FIRST RULE IS ABOUT SPECIFICITY OF TARGET!

SO a good PUA isn't hitting on just any woman , they admit it.

They're culling the herd specifically trying to knock down women who've been " overvalued " in the dating market.

So they aim for the women who meet a very specific criteria.

Except when they talk about it becomes women don't like nice guys!

WHA?!?!

Welcome to that bullshit AGAIN.

Just as with the " enlightened traveler" the " PUA" invents a stereotype they believe in to extricate themselves from.

The AFC or Ugly american and proceeds to fictionalize a noble goal finally ending there terms as AFC's or " learning and understanding cultures"

to make their baser desires

I wanna get laid

I wanna sound be smart

sound noble

That's that bullshit.

Why?

Because as both occurrences so deftly show in theory, practice and execution it creates lots and lots of white noise. Entire discussions aren't about discussing or evaluating the problems but about me centered snark rejoinders and invented premises.

Or course your the not ugly American when you make up the terms of course all women like assholes when the only ones you count are the ones who respond when you act an asshole.

It is all about telling folks what you are and how much you are on the side of angels.

And it's dangerous

Because should someone BELIEVE you they are in for a rude awakening. Should someone believe you're actually interested in fixing things or improving relations they're gonna get smacked down worse than were they dealing with a fullout enemy, or a panty chasing only asshole.

Bullshitters are the real dangerous because the problem isn't that they don't know the truth but that

THEY DON'T CARE. They don't want you to be able to the real work of fixing the shit, or opening gender equalities , or finding a better orgasm , or achieving mental health whatever it is because frankly they SUCCEED in the current equality.

Enlightened tourists can bat their eyes and claimed to be learning when the bogart churches ( lordy Harlem on sunday) by pointing at unenlightened Americans. PUA like the fact there are AFC or alpha males because it makes their system work!

But they can't let you know taht because without it who couldn't they feel superior to!
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And in a connected noteworthy development.

Time it took the National Association of Latino Journalists to support Rutgers women's Bball team: 1 day

Time it took NOW...............

But yes we believe you for all women!
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Freform Linksfest!

So I was talking to Nezua, (and I should have specifc Nezua links but ehh read everything you'll be smarter for it)and then Donna wrote a post about my previous post, then she wrote another one linking to Kactus awesomeness which critiqued Pandagon's BBB and then Kai made a comment to donna's second post as did kactus and

Veronicas MRA' s Manly week makes me happy, also my contribution of the " living G.I joe" who was kind of sexy with the low grade bass in the voice on PUnk'd

I love that Thinking girls PUA post and the one at Amp's STILL GETTING comments. And yep I feel like joining in the fight and connecting it to PHILOSOPHY.

I also heart Joy Nash a lil bit

Thefreeslave makes me happy

I miss Naro

Belledame's awesome right now

At this point I don't read news I read Sylvia and BFP

I swear the only thing preventing my ass from getting bigger is my cha chain aorund my house to hall and oates while trying to do the scissor leg
lalalala Sprinkling love dust
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A good day......

Rehearsed Shakespeare to a two year old , who is talking and can sing vaguely on key.

Sung with said two year old the gospel arrangement of This Little Piggy

ATE LOTS OF GOOD CHEAP SUSHI.

went to see a movie.

The Lookout it's the only thing that didn't make me twitch and C&D has been HOLLERING at me about how I'd Love JGL. Yeah sure ( skinny,white,medium height white guy............ehhhh)

Looks cool and smallish and intriguing.

Towards the end of the movie come up to the End. Character phone faceoff

" I HAVE THE POWER"

BA: I want to have sex with HIM!NOW!

Yes one can make an entire theatre giggle in the middle of a tense shootout

Presented a pop culture outline for a dissertation on societal influences and the problematic creation of QAF and it's ultimate pandering to heterosexual stereotypes and expectation in an attempt to advance a homosexual agenda

and got great life advice from wonderful folks.

Over cupcakes and cherry egg cream.

Yesterday was a good day
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But But It's Just ....................

God I'm tired. MAny folks won't like me after this one

Making it a day ending in Y but I need to get this off my chest

Why is art so unimportant when it hurts me but important when it makes you feel good?

The mere idea of me not liking this one filmmaker and having strong reasonably articulate thoughts about it has driven people to distraction.

Fine whatever .

What bugs me is that they have latched on to it at the expensive of the substance of the posts that used the term and the deluge of whiny bullshit that has followed the posts.

If these people spent the time they spent bitching about how they had a problem with it writing a letter or calling somebody in connection to the issues at hand or throwing up a blogpost in support of women with no there options as they did " defending a multimillionaire filmmaker I think I'd write pages and pages to the glory of SC in response?

What's most interesting is that the responses indicate to me that these women haven't read the fucking post.

And the anonymous questions with no linking or links with no context. It's not cute it's smug and rude. Engage me or don't but don't fucking patronize me .

I reread my own article . I never once say said or imply that Coppola herself is or is not a feminist.

I examined her films and extrapolated out how her structuring of certain films and convenient ofrgetting/rewriting/completely westernizing the narrative was so dead on in terms of how many feminists treat any even REMOTE question that even deems to leave the fucking rails of chocice, birth control, sex, poles lalalala.

And the links of course prove my damn point but hey when you think that the problem is I'm just not well versed enough or don;t fucking get your point of view what's actually listening to my point ?

BEcause when I talk about how much this type of thing and the comparative narrative is dependent on making Westernism and straight up American white aesthetics the center of the fucking world, an interview where a person describes AN ENTIRE MOTHERFUCKING CITY as " either or" or their use of certain symbols as " getting it wrong" and sprinkles " weird through out is really fucking helpful.

ONCE A MOTHERFUCKING GAIN from the top. The mere idea that you would presume to frame your opinion of another place shows the myopia of your relating skills. The fact that you do this from a reasonably expensive hotel instead of youth hostel, or a friends floor is a really excellent example of rampant class bias.

MY GOD. If you lack the vision to go someplace and see it for what it is and then tell me it's weird, I DON'T CARE WHAT FUCKING IRONIC APPROVAL you get from people who are aiming toward westernization, it's still myopic and self centered.

Not to mention the constant but but this person liked it because as we all know all " Others" get together and have a fucking vote on how we feel on shit. Not like we could be diverse people and have some hate this shit and others love it? NO fucking herd pack.

And frankly no you can't have it both ways. The director/film/book/fandom/song is either important and moving enough to change you OR it's inconsequential.

If it's not why the fuck are you arguing with me about it.

Oh that's right for YOU to have an opinion it's a mother fucking right but for me to have one I need a thesis, evidence, and at least three motherfuckers to back me up, but make sure their white.

And lordy I wish , WISH, this shit ended at just people being uptight about me dinging ( even though I didn't ) their hipster goddess.

But nope.

The hits just keep on coming!

It boggles people's mind that we might notice when all the brown folk are oversexed or servants. That it might bother us and I love the justifications of it but but I've been a barista. Tehy make lots of money, but but that's how it's written!

No shit.

It's this prevailing.. like I can't even find another word for it except smugness for right now, that every time WOC/POC/ opens their mouth to observe or say anything it's a character assault rather than a thought.

Like our every thought is consumed with the Magical Negro/Mystic Asian/Wise Native desire to make you act better, or Angry ( insert ethnicity/ "special interest group " identifier ) out to spoil your fun.

I've often wondered if many of the why are we still bothering with white people posts or are frustrations aren't the fact we actually talk bout them that much but that the minute WE OBSERVE ANY FUCKING THING AT ALL it becomes a pity party of why white folk ain't that bad. Like if we voice any objections or point out at all that it's just not okay whatever your reason that it FUCKING HURTS that for once someone will say I see that and I'm sorry and not make the magical morphing transformation into why it's so bad for us to notice or why we take it so seriously!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BECAUSE IT HURTS

Part of the reason it hurts so bad is that we KNOW it's not getting better at all. I felt that post from BFP so much. Because as an actor I've been there. You have to trust and put yourself out there for even light, fluffy mindless, entertainment and if you get deep into the creative process you start to realize why we (POC/strong women/people with disabilities) aren't there.

They work hard to eliminate us.

Trying to comb through auditions for something that isn't a mammy , or trying to explain how it's not hard for you to understand being a fucking intellectual on stage to some snot nosed fuckhead , about why it shouldn't be shocking at fucking all for a Caribbean from the hood to know how to use chopsticks. That is the norm of the life NOT the exception.

or being the first person the lookout when they want contorted body positions, and hookers. Why your nudity is so fucking symbolic, or " important" or advertising of destituteness , never ever erotic ( fetish sure, some amazing show of super(sub)human sexual magic.

OR asked to explain poverty or the Immigrant experience, but the plays about destroying the fat girl, or YET ANOTHER mindless boy meets girl no matter how much they suck

We can always do another one of those.

And that's why This hurt.

I don't think and if I'm wrong I'll say it once that AradhanaD wants to punch the Ren is scum card . But you know that I "I choose to be entertained" .

She nor I can make that choice, by the time the end of the camp scene hits every major trope and bullshit I go through being an actress, being a writer, fuck being a human being on legs while Negro ,female and slant eyed . And the being called whacko thing , do you know how many times when I discuss this movie with people I get

" Can't you just turn it off, NOT EVERYTHING IS POLITICAL"

Because my bringing my life experience to it does what? The fact that the movie made me feel physically ill is off the table?

Did Ren or anyone else do it in thread ? No

But it comes with you, and the same way Ren felt about not having to justify it to anyone ( even though AradhanaD didn't ask) I feel about it being implied that it's a buzz kill to point out that the movie GUTTED me.

The problem isn't you don't deserve mindless entertainment. OR that suddenly enjoying it means you're not playing political enough or checking your ism worksheet. Or asking you to justify it at all.

But the same way your frustrated with justifying it to others, it s frustrating to hear that this experience which so recharged you and was necessary for you to have time with someone is JUST A MOVIE. No one is saying you don't and frankly the I don't deserve thing about political implications

Feels like a slap. Cause as recharging and life affirming as the experience was for some to me. I just felt assaulted.

Because don't I too? Can I watch a movie with out being chucked in the head again again about how shitty my profession thinks of me? Or that after 600 years my body's still the great undiscovered continent?

To be able to not have anything in a film like that reach out and wrench your spleen, or at least be far enough away that you can "choose" to not be offended and just be entertained is an amazing privilege.

And if you have it you have it. Whatever else you been through doesn't make that privilege go away.

But to see the experience of someone who saw that same thing that was so life affirming for you as equally damaging be lumped in with nitpickers.

Yeah that fucking hurts. We all get our mindless entertainment and somewhere I have a privilege and if I don't want to give it up I need to live with how much it existence hurts others.

And what's really amazing to me in this all is.

I'm used to it.

I don't expect at all any special care or consideration from ANYONE, at this point on this shit. Call it the audition process, call it thickening my skin but whatever.

It's just this resignation to seeing people like me eviscerated and waiting for what we know will come .

It's not that serious, or that it made me feel good, can't there be some way it's okay, your life just ain't " real" or " entertaining"?

Yeah it okay for you, just not for me and watching people dance around the fact that when you do it you're saying BA I'm just not thinking about you . You do not matter to me at this moment.
How fucking sad is it that at this point I'd prefer that, the honesty of knowing where people are than hearing how they reconcile that with feeling accepted about their choices.

I accept all your choices, Doesn't mean they don't make me cry, or scream or hurt?

You get your fandom, I get the coffee.

You get the break, I get the heartbreak.

Trust this shit ain't new or at this point that deep.

Just a... for you is just the same old for me. But the same worldview that made a world where you can enjoy these things or find that they speak to you is the same one that makes them destroying and hurtful to me.

So sto being so mad I gave it a name.
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